The Double-Minded Man

There have been times when I prayed variously for strength against temptation, for renewed love for God, for unshakable commitment to a spiritual discipline--any number of things--but I was fooling myself.

No, it was not so much "fooling" myself as it was lying to myself, and to God. These are the stupidest of all lies, because God is never fooled about my true intentions, and neither am I when I submit to an honest examination of conscience.

I reread the epistle of James the other night and could see myself in it. This passage is found in the first chapter:

If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does. (James 1:5-8)

The lesson I drew from this is not that, in order to humbly come to the Lord in prayer, I must first have perfect, rock-solid faith. Such faith is a worthy goal, but it's not a realistic expectation for every stage of our spiritual development. If it were, spiritual "development" would have no meaning; we would already be fully developed.

No, what we need to do is open our hearts fully--truthfully--to God. We should peel back the layers of distraction and deceit to uncover our true intentions.

The double-minded man is not the same as the man who prayed,

I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief! (Mark 9:24)

The difference between the two men is a matter of the will.

The first man is dishonest. He's seeking God's intervention while feigning a desire to please him. He's really saying, "Lord, help me to stop my abusive drinking habit. May your Spirit guide me in my thoughts, and strengthen me against the temptation to -- oops! Hold on. My whiskey bottle just tipped over and I don't want it spilling here in the car."

The second man is sincere. His will is set to please God, not to indulge his vices. He says, "Lord, help me to stop my abusive drinking habit. I have poured all my liquor down the drain, I've disassociated myself from my drinking buddies, and I'm quitting my job as a wine taster. I know I can't do it on my own. I am weak, but you are strong. Please give me the strength to live a sober life."

If you pray for wisdom or anything else, but have "secret" plans for foolishness, God cannot grant your request. Until you change your mind about sin, until you truly desire to be God-oriented, you will be double-minded and unstable in all your ways.

Pray that God will root out all your hidden sins, so that you will find "truth in the inner parts" (Psalm 51:6).